“I’m Not Ready”

When I was asked to plan my very first wedding I said no. Yes, you read that correctly… I said no. Not only did I say no but I said that I wasn’t ready and I didn’t think I could handle it. I mean it was someone’s wedding… The day practically every girl dreams of and subconsciously plans since they’re 8 years old. I couldn’t bear the thought of being responsible for messing that up. There were other factors too though. I hadn’t come up with a brand, didn’t have a website domain and I couldn’t even think of a name for my company. The only wedding I had done up to that point was my sisters and I just didn’t feel ready. Not feeling ready is something that has gotten in my way my entire life.  So I hung up the phone and apologized to my friend, Melissa who was literally handing me my first client on a silver platter and just started feeling bad for myself. Melissa had called me on behalf of her family member who was a hard working lawyer and was just too busy to plan the backyard wedding of her dreams. And to escalate the pressure of the situation the wedding was only 2 months away. I just wasn’t ready. 

I had been working towards being an event planner for a few years at that point. I had spent a year in Tampa, FL working as a nanny and living with a mother of 4 (Kelley) whose style and creativity I so admired. We threw parties at her house together and every piece of style and aesthetic she offered me I soaked in like a sponge and still think of to this day. I still text Kelley to ask her opinion on things from events, personal style and life as a 20 year old female. She gave me so much in that year I lived with her and her family. She gave me advice, patience and most importantly a little more confidence in who I was. Kelley also indirectly hooked me up with a part time job working under another incredibly talented female who ran her own event planning company named, Ally Lamb. She is the owner and creator of a very successful event planning company called, The Social Revelry (sound familiar? – IG: The Social Revelry) all while known as “mom” to FIVE kids! I was obviously more than inspired by Ally in my short time with her and now I base a lot of who I want to be as a company off of her and her company. I was obsessed with how she made a big part of her company revolve around the idea of being social. It’s obviously always about the aesthetics when throwing an event but she definitely created a vibe for her company that emphasized the people attending and throwing the event. She had these really amazing and authentic relationships with her clients and I loved that about her. I’ll carry it with me forever. 

After my year of learning in Tampa I moved back home and spent a few months in NYC. I almost launched a “party in a box” type of company capitalizing on some of the social restrictions of covid but… I didn’t feel ready. I spent that summer (summer 2021) in my home town mostly at my family’s camp and this is when I got that truly life changing call from my friend that I had stupidly turned down. So I’m sitting at my camp feeling sorry for myself and wondering….when I would feel that I was ready? That’s when I realized that the answer to that question was, probably never. At this point I experienced a lot, putting myself out of my comfort zone, moving away from my family to Tampa and now having had some experience in the business. I grew personally and had done some smaller events… Why couldn’t I do a wedding? I began picturing my future and my life was stagnant because I realized that if I waited until I felt ready…I would never take on my first wedding, I would never actually launch my own company and worst of all, I would always wish I had. So I called my friend back and I said, “you know what, I’ll do it!”. In true Laura fashion I was very transparent though. I said that I was scared and that I was sick to my stomach about the idea of messing this up and that it was truly my first wedding but if the bride was ok with all of that, then I was too.

A few short weeks later I met my first bride, Lauren. Not only was she ok with it but she empathized with me and laughed, explaining that she didn’t know what she was doing either and that we would figure it out together. I could not have asked for a kinder, more understanding, free spirited first real client. Lauren was so chill that I offered her a freaking centerpiece switch idea days before her wedding and she simply said, “I love it, let’s go for it!”. The whole wedding was basically DIY and we both had so much fun with it. My boyfriend and I spent 8+ hours the day before the wedding setting up and I absolutely still cried of nervousness the morning of. But I did it. I wasn’t financially stable, I wasn’t established as a company, I wasn’t 100% confident and I wasn’t ready. But I jumped and I flew. That experience was the most fun I’ve ever had in my life and if I waited until I was ready I would’ve never experienced it. 

So long story short… Welcome to my blog, welcome to my adventure, I do not have it all together and I’ll never pretend that I do. And finally, if you take anything out of reading this I urge all of you to not wait until you’re “ready” to take that jump. Even if you don’t fly at first, keep jumping until your legs don’t work anymore. 

Xoxo Laura & TSR.